Why being the best won’t make you happy? 

Some of us will never see ourselves as good enough.  The world portrays this unrealistic need to be the best.  This can leave some people hopeless, thinking that they are so far from being the best, that it is overwhelming to even try.  Fear of failing sets in and distorts our perception of ourselves and we hardly see us as good enough; or even some believe they are in fact the best, only to be let down by what again, appears to be failure if they don’t “win.”  Realistically, there is always going to be someone that is just as good or even better at something than you are.  The ego causes us to be dissatisfied with being good and requires us to need to be the best.  Black and white thinking can cause an ‘all or nothing’ attitude and make any variation of achievement seem insufficient.

This line of thinking can keep us from doing necessary things that allow us to grow and become better versions of ourselves.  This ‘all or nothing’ thought pattern can make us avoid those paths that seem too tough to travel.  If we make a goal of running a mile in under 7 minutes and a whole food diet everyday within the first week, when we can’t even put our running shoes on without being out of breath and eat bags of potato chips and frozen pizzas for dinner, then we may be setting an unrealistic goal for the perception that we have at that time.  The transition will not only be not enjoyable but too overwhelming to even attempt and the chances of giving up or avoiding starting may be greater.

A really important step to change is truly understanding why you are doing what you are doing.  If you are just making changes to fit a social norm, you may choose to rebel and become content with where you are justifying why you don’t need to change, despite the subconscious voice inside your head seeking better habits.  If you just believe that the way you look is most important, you might be seeking results for the wrong reasons which can sometimes prevent progress.  We do not want to set goals that are too out of reach .  We should remember that everyone is beginning from a completely different “starting line” so there really are no winners and the only ‘loss’ is our failure to try.  Eventually we all meet up around the same place which is a better, happier version of ourselves and there are benefit awaiting there for everyone!

You may first need to just put the sneakers on and get to the starting line.  That is a huge step and you may not understand that till down the road when you look back and realize, that seemingly insignificant effort actually started your entire journey.  No step is too small and that is vital to remember, because momentum is what keeps us going.  There is a process of retraining neural plasticity when we are changing our habits to cease the old and begin new ones which requires repetition and consistency.  Smaller increments can help us not to lose momentum and making changes obtainable while making the new habits regular and consistent in our lives which is how you create the new lifestyle of good health.  Once you become strong enough in your habits, it gets easier to take breaks and assure yourself to continue the journey without quitting.  You can always go back to bad habits, they will always welcome you with open arms, so trying a new way has no risks!

So being “the best” will not make you happy, because it doesn’t really exist.  It is a facade and is unattainable which leaves you feeling insecure and over competitive.  Good health is not a competition, it is a sole journey and should not be compared to others in determining whether you are succeeding or not.  Try not to be consumed with what others are doing that you can’t do, because maybe you haven’t gotten to that point yet, but you might very well have the potential manifesting within you.  The goal is to just become better than you were and supportive of who what you are striving to be; healthy!